Thursday, March 26, 2009


i´m in a castle (and it´s not a russian one)
it is a castle i have built by myself,
with walls of  strict structure, strict planning and predictable arrangements.
i have built these walls around me
because i need a structured life, where most things are well planned.
sometimes it´s freedom of choice that drives me mad.
a fear, that every time you make a decision,
you might be missing the other possibility.
for that, i often remain  where i´ve always been
not moving forward.
and the problem is not
that i don´t leave the castle
because the doors are locked.
the problem is
i don´t leave because i don´t want to open the half closed door.
i need someone to knock
and ask hello?
for me.

for a start,
i´ll work on regaining some spontaneity.

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